I can’t stop. 

Why can’t I just stop?

Why can’t this ugly disruptive illness get away from me. 

I feel completely trapped. Unable to move unable to breathe. 

Bulima has a tight grip on me. As soon as I feel like I can go through with recovery it drags me right back down. 

I want help, but bulima does not allow me. It shouts and screams and hits out. Making sure I keep my mouth shut. 

I can’t remember the last time I just ate normal. Without thinking of the place I will purge before even seeing my food. 

I really want to stop this. But have no guide to know where to go, what to do and how to face up to my worst enemy, my own thoughts. 

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